Balance wheel


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It’s been a while since my last writing. Let’s start re-capturing any lesson that passed. I feel like writing about marriage and the stuff related to it, even though I haven’t practice any of it, not even closer. I will try to share my thought and some lesson I got from people around me.

***

What last long won’t come easy…

I kinda agree with that statement, nothing’s easy for a worth having stuff. If we talk about marriage, of course it won’t be an easy task to make it last long, which is means a lifetime. I remember one of my divorced friend said that most of divorced couple regret their decision to get separated, especially for them who unconsciously stating ‘let’s get divorced’ when they lost their temper. You can’t redo what you’ve said, so better first think first before stating any dumb thing that will probably hurt your partner, before it’s too late to save your loved one, before it’s too exhausted to be trapped in regret.

It’s not fair to expect a perfect partner while you, yourself, know well that you’re far from perfect. It’s inevitable that one day your partner will show their bad sides that will disappoint you, and so will you. This is real life, real partner, not a fairy tale. Be realistic, they’re also human who’ll make mistake one day. There will also be a time that you’ll be ugly, disappointing, and will leave them devastated by your behavior. C’mon, be cooperative! It’s a team work, a lifetime team work.

Once mistake were made, all you have to do is to keep giving the other chance for them to fix it. Giving another chance to your life-partner is actually a form of believe, a form of having faith on them that they could be better. This might strengthen the bound between you and your partner. I prefer to take this as a challenge since every married couple out of option but to face each other ugliness. So, be challenged!! Many couple out there has passed this and why couldn’t you? Keep finding more and more reasons to stay married and to tightly hold onto it. Be grateful for whoever life-partner that have been destined for you to complete you, to help you grow better. Keep in mind that there is no reason to giving anyone up. And by the way, being grateful here doesn’t leave you out of responsible to be better and to help them got better.

So, anyway, if you want to stay married please take half responsibility on it. Marriage is not about achieving 100 perfect score no matter who have more loads. Marriage is about achieving 100 perfect score with a balance work-load; it could be 50:50, 40:60, or 45:55, etc. Be a balance wheel for each other. And never think of giving up! You could be an inch away from an ideal marriage.

I know I must sound like a smartass with no experience. Well, at least that what I thought I’ll do to my marriage (once I got married later). I write this as a reminder for me whenever I face a hard time on marriage, so that I won’t forget what I suggest anyone else to do.
Have a good afternoon! So happy to be able to write again!

Jakarta, 031213, 14.41

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One thought on “Balance wheel

  1. ketika ditanyakan kepada mereka tentang hal ini (mempertahankan cinta/rt) saya kira mereka tahu, tapi apakah paham? memahami konsekuensi untuk menjalani, menjaga, akibat/pengorbanan yang harus ditanggung… kadang ego berhitung matematika
    dan… terjadilah…. apa yang tidak ingin terjadi…. sebuah #ironi kehidupan
    makasih untuk pembelajarannya 🙂

    jadi kapan nih untuk mempraktekan mempertahankan? semoga segera.

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